Tuesday, January 24, 2006

Career Moves (written last month i think)

It’s always easy for me to look at a person and envision the greatness in that person.

I always find myself coming across scholarship, employment, training, blah, blah opportunities for someone. I saw an ad for a P1M research grant in the newspaper and I thought how exciting it would be if the boyfriend of a friend would try his luck. I visited the UP CBA site and I YM’d my college friend who’s presently working in Thomson Financial, to convince her to take the MS Finance program. When I talked to my sister in Australia, I convinced her to apply for an IT position at Accenture Australia. She was really excited about it, asking me about how to apply, asking me what kind of answers would look good on her essay questions. I had a friend in URC who I convinced to leave his job and join me at Colgate-Palmolive Phils. I even ribbed the HR Recruitment Specialist to take special notice of his resumé. Just recently, I bombarded a friend with Jobstreet ads. A short while after receiving them, she thanked me, saying she applied for most of the ads I sent her.gt

I remember back in elementary school there was this girl who thanked me for encouraging her to become a leader, that I actually saw that in her (she ran and won the student council elections, and achieved so many things). I was surprised then, I didn’t even realize I was responsible for any of that. It had felt good at the time, to be able to make a positive difference in a girl’s life, but how sure am I that was best for her?

I found myself feeling partially guilty about these things right after I told them what I think would be the best move for them. Did I put a spotlight on the dilemma they were trying to keep private? Did I spoil their plans, their I-own-my-destiny convictions by interfering and telling them what to do when they could have thought about it already in the first place? I think I’m doing them a favor, but AM I?

I don’t know exactly if I made a positive difference in the lives of these people. Or that somehow my suggesting (telling) them what to do has underestimated their worth at their current rate. In all honesty, I never intended to make them feel smaller than they really are, but sometimes I like to scare the hell out of people to make them realize that they ought to step up and make a major turn in their lives. I act like I know the formula for success – at least careerwise. But who am I to know? Who do I think I am anyway, telling these people what to do?

When I look at the present lives of these people I’ve nagged once or every now and then, I find traces of the things that I have urged them to do. Occasionally, I see how happy they are where they are; but sometimes, they are in a limbo, more confused than ever, still trying, to get “there”. Have I unconsciously set an unrealistic standard for themselves? Have I embarrassed these people by encouraging them to try something, and then by some bad luck, they didn’t make it somehow?

What does that make me? Am I an encourager, like a bird urging her little ones to leave the nest and fly? Or am I simply a nagger, never satistified with what a person has achieved? And what about myself? Would I know what’s best for me? I’m not exactly where I hoped to be.

Posted by xam :: Tuesday, January 24, 2006 :: 2 Comments:

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