Sunday, November 13, 2005

Rest in Peace

One of the good things about the passage of time is that finally, certain matters that used to be complicated or mysterious become unraveled and things may lay to rest.

For the most part, I hear people complain or be amazed by the quickness time flies. I hear gripes about ageing, and how terrifying it is to start counting fine lines, lost hopes and how dreams have somehow vanished with age, increasing expectations and how everyone else around is marching like toy soldiers over the hill (otherwise called life).

The good news is that through the passage of time, we get to confront the past. A couple who had a bitter break-up can finally rebuild a new friendship if they're still interested and willing to. The painful memories have somehow become just a chapter and not the highlight in their history, grouped along with all the good parts. The learning and growing part have taken place, and as soon as maturity moves in, bitterness moves out.

We get to ask questions that have been left unanswered for a while. And on the other side of it, we also get to answer questions placed in front of us for the past n years and finally we’re ready to answer them. With the aid of mobile phones and friendster, the long-dreaded, long-overdue answers are just a text or an email away. The answers may not seem to matter anymore, at least not as much as it used to when it was still fresh, but hell, answers are answers, and they satisfy our curiosity, they appease us.

We get to make confessions we never imagined to reveal before. It all comes out so easily after a while, and it’s funny to recall how it had become so difficult in the first place. After a while, it becomes alright to admit that you smoked pot to your parents. Or that you fooled around with some other girl while you were in a “serious” relationship. The confession’s delayed, the truth of the offense is delayed, but punishment can’t be delayed. There’s no point for punishment anymore. It's done over with. One the lighter side, there are those long-held secrets that are ready to come out. Like crushes - things that you kept secret with dear ol' life, and now you just spurt them out like it's really nothing, coz it's really nothing anymore. Over time you'll be surprised to find out that this or that guy apparently had a crush on you back then (and you'll be surprising people too with your own confessions. then again, maybe it had been to obvious anyway back then, haha!). It's over, and now it's just a cute thought. Thing is, I always thought confessions are one of the few spices of renewed relationships, and when they’re out in the open, we grow as people, even just a little bit.

So here I go letting time fly by. And once in a while, at the turning points of my life, I get to confront the past and allow it to finally, rest in peace. And then I move on to complicate matters, endure new pains, create new mysteries. Eventually, all must lay to rest. I really don't want any unfinished business.

Posted by xam :: Sunday, November 13, 2005 :: 0 Comments:

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